Non-Thirsty Thursday: Pretending to Drink Alcohol When You’re Pregnant

Thursday, April 16, 2015

When a woman is of childbearing age, all eyes are on her drink while out with friends. If she’s not drinking, all signs typically lead to pregnancy. When all eyes were on me for the last several years, I felt myself going above and beyond to prove I wasn’t preggo. After rounds of shots, I’d typically remove all doubt.

As someone that LOVES wine, hiding my drinking until we were ready to tell family and friends that I’m knocked up was a bit tricky. However, I was up for the challenge and was able to fool some people - especially around the holidays! Here’s how.

Non-Alcoholic Wine - THIS STUFF IS AWESOME. Okay, it isn’t like the most awesome-est tasting thing, but it’s an awesome way to fake drinking wine! I drank this on Thanksgiving and fooled a number of family members. The key was not letting them see me pour the wine into the cup. My grandma even commented that I was "drinking too much" and that my "cup of wine was too big." Boy, did I surprise her when I broke the news over Christmas. The non-alcoholic beer in a glass at the bowling alley that night really sealed the "she's-not-pregnant" deal too. The beer was a non-alcoholic Labats and I don’t recommend it.

Soda Water with a Splash of Cranberry & a Lime - This non-alcoholic drink that looks like a cocktail got me through a wedding in December. They key here is to ask for your non-alcoholic drink in the same glass they are serving the alcoholic drinks. And asking the bartender to add garnishes to really give it that cocktail look.

The Beer Trick * THIS MAY BE THE BEST ONE ON THE LIST! * - Holiday happy hours brought upon some anxiety for me, so I devised a beer trick. I’d order beer in a bottle (not uncommon for me) and then go to the bathroom with the bottle, dump out the beer and fill it back up with water. No one suspected a thing! I did the beer trick at least five times.

Those were pretty much my tricks for hiding the drinking. I’d love to hear any other tips!