True Life: I Survived the Jersey Shore

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

While my Jersey shore experience wasn’t a scene from “True Life: I’m a Jersey Shore Girl,” (above) below you will find some highlights and key learning’s from my weekend as a shoebie.

1. The Philly Airport sucks so bad its mascot should be a Flier: Us Chicagoians use a lot of four-letter words to describe O’Hare airport, but I must say I’ve found something way worse – the Philadelphia International Airport. While I am proud to be from Pennsylvania, I am not happy to share a state with this place. One drop of rain and you are delayed two hours. And forget about seating. The Southwest terminal has like 10 seats and an open space that looks more like a triage center than airport.

Key Learning’s: Fly early. Bring lots of airport toys. Drink liquor on the rocks and dare friends to do crazy things. It passes time.

2. Make a mix cd, hit the highway: The most cost effective way to visit the shore is via Hertz rent-a-car. Not only was Marcus a kick-a$$ van driver, Lauren, Lindsey and I only paid $75 to rent the car and park it at Harrah’s. That includes gas! Oh, and you MUST go with the EZ Pass.

Key Learning’s: Make a mix CD for the road, don’t forget Neil Diamond, Miley Cyrus and a little Bon Jovi.

3. Don’t be so sure about seeing the shore: The weather is more unreliable than using Amy Wienhouse as a designated driver. Therefore, when planning a Jersey shore trip, don’t count on beach time – especially in May.

Key Learning’s: In the AC, Harrah’s is a great alternative. While it isn’t on the shore (a trip to the beach would require a drive or jitney), there is a nice indoor pool. Also visit The Pier – it’s basically an inside boardwalk.

4. Taking a gamble can be fun: While Lindsey, Lauren and I sat at the airport bar, we decided to play a little betting game. I said that if the Penguins scored two goals in the first period alone, I would put on my Sid the Kid shirt. I lived up to my end of the bargain, but needless to stay, Lindsey didn’t dance on the bar like Coco or make out with the Silver Fox and Lauren didn’t call Tony collect from the payphone.

Key Learning’s: In addition to our airport wagers, we also won some money on the slot machines and in turn got free drinks! A colleague informed me today her friend won $1,700 on a nickel slot. I am not encouraging you to go all Charles Barkley, but minimal wagering can me fun – with out without money.

5. Hot tubs are safe: I am keeping this blog PG-13, but I just wanted to state for the record that my body is just fine from our dip in the hot tub.

Key Learning’s: It’s a bachelorette party. You can still be protective of your body while having fun.

FYI – For you readers who aren’t down with the lingo, A shoobie (or shoebie) is a derogatory term used in South Jersey to describe a tourist who visits the seashore for a brief period of time, primarily to use the beach during the summer months.

(sources:, Wikipedia)
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