Don't Be That Girl

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Back in 2004, there was a lot of buzz about the book He’s Just Not That Into You. Once I read the previews, I knew I had to have this book. It reminded me of my dating style – if the guy doesn’t like you, kick him to the curb before he can dump you.

Although I was in a happy relationship, I went to my local Boarders to purchase the book. The lovely clerk said, “Oh honey, I heard this book really helps.” I told her I was in a relationship, thank you very much.

I was pleased when I heard that they were creating a movie based on the best-seller. While I haven’t seen the movie, I thought I would share some wisdom’s from the book – just in time for Valentine’s Day.

* He’s Just Not That Into You If…he’s not calling you. With the advent of cell phones and speed dating, it’s almost impossible not to call you. (100% of men polled said they’ve never been too busy to call a woman they were really into)

* He’s Just Not That Into You If…he’s having sex with someone else.

* He’s Just Not That Into You If…he only wants to see you when he’s drunk. You deserve to be with someone who doesn’t have to get loaded to be around you.
- If you don’t know where a relationship is going, it’s okay to pull over and ask.

* He’s Just Not That Into You If…he’s breaking up with you. If he’s not calling you to tell you he hired a U-Haul to come pick up all your stuff and move it back into his house, then consider yourself a nice, downy, little pillow cushioning him from his fear of loneliness and loss that he’s not fully ready to deal with on his own.
- Don’t be flattered that he misses you – he should miss you.
- Deciding to get back together with someone is a complicated and difficult decision. Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in the beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company.
- There’s a guy out there that wants to marry you.
- No answer is your answer.
- Don’t give him the chance to reject you again.
- Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with.
- Don’t be that girl.

The last tip just might be my favorite. That is something the older girls used to tell us when we joined the sorority and were getting ready for our first big frat party. Don’t be that girl.

And remember ladies, just because Hallmark, 1-800-Flowers and restaurants want to rack in some extra dough this weekend, it doesn’t mean you need to be all depressed just because you are alone on V-Day. Go out and get wasted. The holiday is still dumb when you are in a relationship…or even engaged.

P.S.- When I opened my copy of the book to write this post, I found a boarding pass from 11/16/04. That was my flight to Chicago to interview for my job. Just another reminder I’ve been there way too long!
(Quotes taken directly from “He’s Just Not That Into You” by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo; Photos:,